word drift

a collection of musings and snippets from my life

Edinburgh

coming home

I’m writing this on the train, as I head north towards home for the holidays. I’ve made this journey many a time since starting university but there’s always something that makes me stop what I am doing and stare out of the window. Sometimes it’s the view as we pull out of Waverley station with the castle looming over us or the expansiveness of the Firth of Forth as we cross the Forth Bridge. Other times it’s the houses in the small towns that stand defiantly close to the railway tracks, the cattle and the sheep grazing in the seemingly never-ending fields, or the way the sparseness of the countryside gives way to the creeping density of the cities. Today, it’s the warmth and stillness as the train hurtles along the coast, the glaring sun above and the glimmering sea below.

I’m coming home.

And I’m coming home to this little blog of mine too.

It’s been sitting in stagnancy for too long, gathering dust, and I’m not sure I can really offer an excuse as to why it’s taken me so long to return. I guess I’ve been preoccupied with other things in life and over time it became easier and easier to resist the pull, that longing to post something. That’s the danger I found when I distanced myself: I began to forget how it filled a part of me in ways nothing else could. But having realised this and as I try to find my way back, I feel that same warmth and stillness spreading inside. I’m travelling along the coast and the world is stretching before me.

I want to hold on to this feeling, even when I am unmotivated and especially when I am uninspired. I want to persevere and not shrink back. To keep writing, keep creating. It doesn’t have to be perfect straight away; the last thing I should do is let the fear of starting get the better of me.

So from now on I’m going to revive my neglected online ‘home’, breathe life into the half-finished drafts that lie abandoned, share my words again and re-join the wonderful blogging community. My winter break lasts for a month this year so I want to use the time purposefully: curl up with all the books I’ve been meaning to read, put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard, start practising yoga again, go out when it’s light with my film camera. Unwind, take a pause and slow down, devote time to doing things for me.

I’m home. 

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11 Comments

  1. Reply 19th December, 2017 at 2:34 pm

    Welcome home Beverley 🙂 We’re here to welcome you back with big warm open arms. It’s understandable that you haven’t posted on your blog for a while, it happened to me too. The way you described your train ride is so beautiful, by the way. Now that you’re back, I look forward to reading your future posts. I’ve missed reading your blog so much, honestly ;o; Once again, welcome back!

    1. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 1:41 am

      Thank you so much for your warm welcome, Nana – your comments always make my day <3 I hope you find the motivation to write again too but I'll be patiently waiting 🙂 And Happy New Year!

  2. Reply 21st December, 2017 at 2:38 pm

    Welcome back! It’s okay not to have written in awhile but I am glad that you’re home because you are always welcomed here.

    1. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 1:44 am

      Thanks for leaving a lovely comment, Michelle! Happy New Year 🙂

  3. Reply 25th December, 2017 at 1:54 pm

    Welcome home and Happy Holidays, Beverly! Me too had been MIA for few months already and I recently came back. How was your holidays?

    1. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 1:46 am

      Thanks for dropping by, Kai! Welcome back to you too 🙂 My holidays have been lovely so far – how about yours?

  4. Reply 28th December, 2017 at 10:16 pm

    I think it’s totally okay to take as many breaks and pauses as you need to. You definitely don’t need a excuse! But I am excited that you’re back to blogging! Looking forward to your future posts and I hope the rest of your break and the rest of the year is awesome!

    1. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 1:48 am

      I must stop feeling guilty about taking breaks… but I’m very excited to be back! Thanks for leaving such a lovely comment and Happy New Year, Rezina!

  5. Reply 31st December, 2017 at 9:38 am

    I’m really excited to know you’re back :’) I really enjoyed reading your previous posts and I’m thrilled to read the future ones you’re going to post soon.

    Wishing you a wonderful new year!

    1. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 1:52 am

      Thank you for for this wonderful comment, Yuki! Hopefully my future posts won’t disappoint 🙂 And best wishes for the new year to you too!

  6. Reply 1st January, 2018 at 4:19 am

    i just found your blog and I’m loving it
    https://sykirah.blogspot.my

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